I wonder how many of us approaching the autumn of our years when reflecting back on our life’s journey will be able to single out the one decision, the one commitment, the one path taken, that stitched together the entire fabric of fulfillment, accomplishment, and happiness from that moment forward? For me the answer is easy. Next week will mark the 43rd anniversary of that decision. As a twenty-one year old inexperienced and immature dunderhead, I made the most important decision of my life…and my best one. I committed my future, my fortunes and my heart to the woman who became then and has remained my wife and my soulmate.
Honestly, I can’t say that on that day I had complete faith that this was the woman who would always keep her promises, who would always be there when I needed her, who would always have my best interests at heart, and that together we would be able to face anything in life. I couldn’t fathom then that together we would gift the world with two wonderful sons who would grow into remarkable young men. Nor on that day could I have ever imagined the joy we would share in beholding and holding our two grandchildren.
How could either of us have known at that time what wonders lay before us? Our heads couldn’t, but our hearts did. Admittedly, over the ensuing years our “heads” often led us to conflict and even doubt, but our “hearts” remained committed to the love for each other that filled them. Like most of us who risk sharing our lives with another, it took time, dare I say years, for us to discover that the truest form of love is how you behave toward someone, not just how you feel about them.
Now, after spending nearly two-thirds of our lives together, I find it easy to remember the many wonders we have encountered as we’ve journeyed hand-in-hand down our ever twisting road of life. Remarkably, the inevitable bumps and potholes we stumbled on are but dim images.
In his book, The Meaning of Marriage: Facing the Complexities of Commitment with the Wisdom of God, author Timothy Keller wrote, “To be loved but not known is comforting but superficial. To be known and not loved is our greatest fear. But to be fully known and truly loved is, well, a lot like being loved by God. It is what we need more than anything. It liberates us from pretense, humbles us out of our self-righteousness, and fortifies us for any difficulty life can throw at us.”
This is the majestic consequence of what began 43 years ago when two youngsters committed to love and cherish one another as long as they both would live and then lived up to that commitment and in so doing has happily led them to where they are today: The August Couple.
She is fair to see and sweet,
Dainty from her head to feet,
Modest, as her blushing shows,
Happy, as her smiles disclose,
And the young man at her side
Nervously attempts to hide
Underneath a visage grim
That the fuss is bothering him.
Pause a moment, happy pair!
This is not the station where
Romance ends, and wooing stops
And the charm from courtship drops;
This is but the outward gate
Where the souls of mortals mate,
But the border of the land
You must travel hand in hand.
You who come to marriage, bring
All your tenderness, and cling
Steadfastly to all the ways
That have marked your wooing days.
You are only starting out
On life’s roadways, hedged about
Thick with roses and with tares,
Sweet delights and bitter cares.
Heretofore you’ve only played
At love’s game, young man and maid;
Only known it at its best;
Now you’ll have to face its test.
You must prove your love worthwhile,
Something time cannot defile,
Something neither care nor pain
Can destroy or mar or stain.
You are now about to show
Whether love is real or no;
Yonder down the lane of life
You will find, as man and wife,
Sorrows, disappointments, doubt,
Hope will almost flicker out;
But if rightly you are wed
Love will linger where you tread.
There are joys that you will share,
Joys to balance every care;
Arm in arm remain, and you
Will not fear the storms that brew,
If when you are sorest tried
You face your trials, side by side.
Now your wooing days are done,
And your loving years begun. – Edgar Albert Guest
Have an AWE-full Weekend!
William J. “Bill” Bacqué